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Posted By: John Kuvakas Moderator
Posted On: Saturday May 16, 2020 at 11:44 AM
 
Message:
"Lexophiles" from Bob Jackman
"Lexophile" describes those who have a love for words, such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish", and "To write with a broken pencil is pointless."

+ England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

+ Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

+ This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore.

+ I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

+ A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

+ When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.

+ I got some batteries that were given out free of charge.

+ A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

+ A will is a dead giveaway.

+ With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

+ Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

+ Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.

+ A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.

+ The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine last week is now fully recovered.

+ He had a photographic memory but it was never fully developed.

+ When she saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

+ Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.

+ I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

+ Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

+ When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

+ When chemists die, they barium.

+ I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

+ I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

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Message thread:

"Lexophiles" from Bob Jackman by John Kuvakas #48273Moderator
Hahaha....my laugh for the morning. Love these. (EOM) by Jack Dodds #48273.1
yes, very funny.... (EOM) by Joop Gisbers #48273.2




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